Saturday, June 18, 2011

Addressing some questions.

This is the first picture we saw of Jeremy, we call it his mug shot.  We had no idea where he lived when we saw that photo.  All we saw was the little boy that God had hand picked for our family.  Jed's first words when I showed him Jeremy's picture were, "that's my brother!"  He didn't know that David and I had discussed adoption, he didn't know why we were looking at his picture.  He just knew.  His innocent little heart was directly and instantaneously spoke to by our Heavenly Father, that that was his brother! 

At the point it didn't matter if Jeremy lived across town or on the other side of the world.  A path had been put before us.  I liken it to looking up at a mountain.  You can see the peak, but you have no clue how you are going to get there except one foot in front of the other.  You may see the canyon up ahead, but can't see the bridge strewn across until you have enough faith and perseverance to get to the edge of that canyon.  There are brier patches all along the way.  The path is not flat and straight.  There will be blisters and tears, but all is for the ultimate reward awaiting at the summit!  

That is literally the picture in my mind through this journey.  I look back and see what I learned from stumbling over that stone.  I see the wasp nest that stung so hard and how to avoid it up ahead.  We learn from our mistakes, but most of all keep persevering toward a little boy who waits.

A little boy who waits to have one hug from his mommy.  A little boy who waits to hear a bed time story from his daddy.  A little boy who waits to ride bikes with his big brother.  A little boy who waits to be pushed higher and higher on a swing by his big sister.  A little boy who waits to play fetch with his dog.  A little boy who has nothing.  Who isn't deemed worthy of parental love in his society because when his DNA converged an extra chromosome got put in an unusual spot.  That chromosome has kept him from his ultimate dream......until now.

As hurtful as it is, I am not blind to the looks or deaf to the whispers.  We hear what people are saying.  But, we also know that it is hard to understand how a mother and father could fall in love with a little boy with special needs.  Fall in love with all what we mere humans call 'imperfections."  God doesn't make mistakes.  Jeremy was wove perfectly as intended. He will bless this world with all the gift he was given.  We will give him the love he deserves to flourish in this world.

Back in November 2010,  almost 5 months before we received a heavenly call to be Jeremy's mom and dad, we planned and promised a birthday get away for our kids.  Something we had dreamed of giving our kids since before they were born.  Our whole "family" made up of 11 people devised a plan to take a vacation to Florida.  We payed all of our non-refundable fees or (practically non-refundable) prior to Jeremy ever coming into our lives.  Did we, meaning David and I, feel guilty about taking such a "lavish" vacation? Sure. But, what were we to do break all 4 kids hearts that were going on this trip and then forfeit most of the money.  So we re-coordinated and figured out how to be as frugal as possible.  We literally fed 11 people for almost 4 days for $350.  We took coolers and water bottles.  We didn't buy souvenirs.  We went frugal.  And you know what?!  We had a great time.  But even though plenty of people said, no don't feel guilty, it is an experience for you kids.  But, come to find out others feel it would have been more responsible to forfeit the money and not go.  I struggle with it? How do you justify throwing all that money previously paid away and taking the experience away from all those people?  We are open to discussion, honestly.

At home, we have cancelled our cable, do not go out to eat other than maybe once a week $1 menu, MAYBE.  We are doing our very best to save as much as we can on our own.  We are very happy that thus far we have paid all the adoption expenses thus far without fundraising.  Everything we have fund raised has gone into a separate savings account.  That account equals $2500.  We add to it almost daily. 

Jeremy will have the opportunity to grow up and contribute to society.  He will have a job and pay taxes, just like you and me because he was given a chance at life.  If he stays where he is, he will be institutionalized.  The state who doesn't want him, will do the bare minimum to keep him alive and unfortunately, some kids don't live long in the institution.  It's just a reality.  Kids need love as much as they need food.  Jeremy will be part of a household that respects financial responsibility, pays taxes, has health insurance, is not on state aid.  These are assumptions some people have had, that some how he will automatically be on food stamps and state aid.  I had no idea! We had to prove our financial worthiness and health insurance to even be able to commit to him. 

Please if you are hesitant to help just talk to us.  We are happy to live in a glass house if that's what it takes to get our little boy home.  Once he's home, we got it.  We can take care of him. But, just like with any adoption there are hoops and fees.  His country is holding him ransom is the best word I can think of.  They call it a facilitation fee, $9000 facilitation fee.

Please email or comment.  We are pleading as parents to parents to please help give our son a chance at life.  What we need is a drop in the bucket on the grand scheme of things.  Wealthy people spend the kind of money that is life or death to Jeremy on a night out.  We are only asking for 1000 $20 donations.  A large pizza basically. 

Thank you so much to those who have supported us both financially and spiritually and with helping hands!  You know who you are!  May blessings be bestowed you and yours!



  1. People who make comments like that should be do people sit down to a fancy dinner/movie etc knowing there are children who need mommies and daddies and could benefit from as little as 10 dollars.we need to love one another as god intended maybe if more people did there wouldnt be anymore orphans..I have a hardtime sleeping at night when i know so many are dieing and need families..

  2. I am proud of you for addressing this head on, and for bringing your boy home. I am proud of you for giving things up, and I will support you by donating my $20.

  3. Also, two weeks from now I am going to meet a whole cadre of Reece's Rainbow children. Kid who were once orphans and are no longer. Kids who were brought home by the donations and love and prayers of strangers. and I'm going to hug each and every one of them. And one day we'll include your son in the ranks of those who used to be orphans.